champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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