my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize