walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Randomize
