Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
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