She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
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