do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Randomize
