Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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