Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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