Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
