So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
