How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
That reminds me...we need to get swords
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
