her vagina looked like bernie madoff
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
