Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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