Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
