Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Randomize
