meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
