Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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