tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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