and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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