I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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