uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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