Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
