How'd it feel making her break her religion?
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
