If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize