You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
