Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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