Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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