would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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