i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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