How'd it feel making her break her religion?
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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