My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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