I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
There r osticjed everywhere
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Randomize
