We're facebook friends in real life
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
