ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
