you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize
