all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
