at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
