she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
