i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
