My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
