I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Randomize
