i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Randomize
