I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
