Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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