Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
