Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
