the new term for farting is butt boxing.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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