you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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