me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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