I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
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